resurgence of "the wolf"

last year, if my memory serves, i had mentioned “wolf hunting.”
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january 2009

as part of the name brigade

and i quote
the wolf= a girl miss rabbit knows; always wears a wolf shirt and has a man voice; me and miss rabbit go wolf hunting all the time
end quote.
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well, ladies and gentlemen, i never thought i’d live to see the day, that i’d actually HAVE A CLASS WITH THIS SPECIMEN! french 102.
it’s a relatively small class, and on the first day we gathered our desks around in a circle, and introduced ourselves. for blogging purposes only, i have persuaded the vestiges of morality left in my brain to allow me to use the wolfs first name. it just adds a special something to "it."

we je m'appelle(d) our way around the room when the torch came to "shelby" (again, real name). me, bored and not paying attention perked up at her coarse and entirely american "jam apphell." i looked at the owner of this, and oh god my sweet lawrd! the wolf!

the wolf, with her ever-present scarf (headband? hankie?) tied indian style around her forehead. her frizzy dishwater blonde hair confined in a low ponytail. her pink complexioned face. manly features. testosterone infused vocal chords. and her t-shirt. navy blue cotton with a roaring wolf image splayed across it's front. oh, and the high waisted boys jeans she does not, i regret to say, wear well.

everyday i am faced with this wolf. everyday she speaks her bad french, is a day i unsuccessfully stifle smiles and giggles. i know it's mean, but with all the history i know about her and then seeing her in the flesh, it's overwhelming.

a classic wolf behaviorism:

the wolf was asked to partner up with a girl across the room for a conversation piece acted out in front of the class. since the desks are locked in a circular shape, the wolf instead of scooching one out and squeezing between it, climbed atop her desk, dirty black hiking boots shuffling her across, crawled hands above knees, and then swung/jumped herself off like she was acting in an action movie. a really horrible action movie.

it was painful to watch. extremely painful.

and today, madame g was gone so madame s was teaching, and she passed around the roll sheet on which everyone who was present wrote down their name. the paper came to me i looked down, there written in broad boyish print:

Shelby "the Wolf" -last name-.

i had no words.